A Celebration of Tao and Defiant Women and Girls Everywhere

I have a confession to make: I’m an addict. I am addicted, not to drugs or alcohol, but to the interactive word game, Words With Friends.

For those of you who have not had the dubious pleasure of playing, here’s a brief explanation: Using one’s iPad, iPhone, Kindle Fire or computer (through Facebook) you place letter tiles on a “board” much as you would if playing Scrabble. Your move (tile placement) flies through the internet and lands on the “board” of your opponent who, in turn, places her tiles and sends it back to you. Each letter carries a point value and the winner is the player who has accrued the most points in her tile placements.

As most addictions do, this started out benignly enough; an invitation to play with my friend, Donna. Learning how to play. Finding myself being beat up and losing by hundreds of points each game. Remaining tenacious in my quest to improve in both my Words With Friends vocabulary and my defensive strategies.

It’s fun, educational, keeps my mind active and alert and, sometimes keeps me from doing the work I should be engaged in.

Prior to Words With Friends I had been obsessed with the local paper’s Sudoku, cryptogram, Jumble and crossword puzzle.

We all need something that will take our minds off of the daily grind and this is one way I find solace. I also enjoy reading, hiking, jogging (when my bum knee allows) while listening to country music on my iPod. Oh, and yes, lets not forget my guilty pleasure of watching American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance.

It was at a UConn women’s basketball game where I discovered that a friend who happens to occupy the seat next to mine also plays Words With Friends. In fact, she is so into it that she’s written a poem reflecting its joys. That poem – which I share with you below – gave me the driection for this issue of The Gathering: Play and relaxation. Or as my grandkids call it – chillaxing.

We all need to take the time to chillax. If we continued with our hectic, daily schedules without a break we’d be no good to anyone as mental and physical exhaustion would take over and keep us from performing to our best abilities. All too often, however, we tend to think we’re being “lazy” and feel waves of guilt when not scurrying around accomlishing some task or other.

Nonesense! Without the chill time those tasks overtake us, overwhelm us and keep us from doing our best work.

So think about how you can chillax today and make sure you do. Believe me, you will feel refreshed and ready to take on the world if you’ve given yourself that much needed down time.

As for me, well, even though I admitted that playing Words With Friends at times keeps me from doing my work, I have found that when I eventually do get around to tackling my required task, it is accomplished more quickly, efficiently and joyfully than if I had pushed myself without having allowe myself to first enjoy the play time.

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I had sent a request to you all to let me know just how you chillax – what activities you engage in that help you to unwind.

Many thanks to those of you who sent fun responses. I am pleased to share them with all Tao and Defiant women and girls here:

Grace G. shared this beautiful image:

Have you ever listened to the waves on a blustery day? The sound beyond the roar. The quiet hiss and bubble and watery sigh. It can take you anywhere very gently.

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Sue T. wrote:

My youngest daughter, when she was little, used to put on a one-piece playsuit and called it her ‘laxing in the sun suit!’

She is now 31 – and references that but isn’t as cute as when she was 3 but does ‘relax’ in the sun in a swimsuit – not a playsuit.

I asked Sue if she does the same and she responded:

I will not do this to the world of humanity – at least not out in public!!! :)

And when I pointed out her lack of Tao and Defiant attitude with that comment, she came back with:

But I am concerned about the environment and seeing my body in such a state would cause crowds and crowds of admirers and those crowds could leave litter and I cannot allow that to happen and destroy the earth upon which they stand!!!! How’s that?

“That”, Sue, is a Tao and Defiant woman at her best!

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Lonnie S. told us:

I shop…

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Donna F. shared:

How I chillax- walking, yoga, playing with my dog, gardening, words with friends, watching Jon Stewart.

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Mary D.M. chillaxes in much the same ways I do:

I love to read a good book too, preferably in the out-of-doors in my chaise lounge, and I find crossword puzzles very relaxing as well. There is also nothing better for me than a nice, long meandering hike on a beautiful day, and Sunday mornings in my hot tub with a cup of herbal tea.

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Dale A. talked about her need to be outside:

For me, it’s all about getting OUTSIDE! I need to be in beautiful places in nature…. a walk along the beach or in the woods brings me back to my center. In fact, I need to get out everyday, wind, snow, warm, cold – unless there’s really a driving rain! We are made of the stuff of the earth, and the cyclical rhythms of nature harmonize with our own. I come home to my body and soul in the sacred outdoors.

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Marci T. wrote about her time chillaxing when down with the flu:

I watched TV and went numb. PLayed Facebook games for hours . It was also during this time that I found that walking the dog or playing fetch with her outside improved my mood as well as cleared my head.

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Carol H admitted that chillaxing:

Is something new to me after retirement from teaching. Can’t believe we are that much alike–words with friends with a glass of wine is the ultimate. Twenty minutes with my latest book choice. Such as Hunger Games. Raced my 10-year-old grandson through that series. Travel is king. Going to the Kentucky Derby. Love horse racing.

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Cate W. gave us this insight into her downtime:

About four months after “retiring” from my high stress job as an IT Business Analyst in December of 2010, I decided I had too much “down time” and wasn’t ready to retire. So I went to work as a part time in-home companion, which, as it turns out, although I love it, is in different ways more stressful than the business world. Now I really need my down time and spend it doing crossword puzzles with my husband at the breakfast table, knitting (in the winter) and gardening (in the summer); I am learning to play African drums (once a month or so I attend a drumming circle), and I still read Taoist and other spiritual books. I am trained as a voice actor and I currently volunteer for an organization that records books for the blind and physically disabled. Although this is “work” and not technically down time, it is such fun that it is the highlight of my week.

Hello to all my fellow defiant Tao women

If you have not yet responded shared with us your ways of chillaxing, please feel free to post your comments at the end of this newsletter – we’d love to hear from you!

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SPRING WISDOM

Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.

~Chinese Proverb

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AND NOW FOR A LITTLE FUN

That friend of mine, the gal who sits next to me at UConn games and whose poem I promised I’d share with you, is Sharon Scull. Sharon’s writing has appeared in past issues of The Gathering and it’s so much fun to share one of her fun poems again:

WSRDO, DORWS, WORDS

So addicted I am
to Words With Friends
An application on my IPAD, IPHONE
A scrabble game I play with other people It’s just about the first thing I do
when I wake up in the morning and the last things I do
before I go to sleep at night Have to see if anyone
has done their words so it will be my turn
11 or 12 games going at one time
Sometimes, all the games are ready for me to play at once My head is spinning
Brain working letters every day
Can I get to a triple word space?
Or at least a double word space?
Bummer—-sometimes I have all vowels
or even worse
great letters but NO vowels
Hate to swap letters and then have to miss a turn Have to admit
I LOVE this game!!!!

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TAO AND DEFIANT NEWS AND TRAVELS

If you have news and engagements coming up during this spring season, please email me with the details and I will include it here in The Gathering and on the information exchange page of our website.

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Click on this link to see our calendar

There’s more in the works so please keep checking back!

(As I’m always open to the possibility of a last minute request,
please go to the travels page of this website for updated information.

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As always, I hope you have enjoyed reading The Gathering, and look forward to receiving your comments along with your own stories and news.

As for the next issue of The Gathering, well it will come out in the summer, with Tao and Defiant updates to continue when I have news to share with you all.

Thank you for being part of the Tao and Defiant community.

CJ